I give you a complete “I hear you” book review. I summarize my quick answer about this listening book;
The technique makes you closer to others.
Never invalidate their emotions. It provides self courage towards validation.
Validation is not accepting others’ threats.
Its focus is on verbal communicating words.
It enhances positive calmness towards response. It’s a practical guide for listeners.
The book has some serious drawbacks. Sorensen never distinguishes gender roles towards listening. The book is a quick read. Never explain whole listening skills.
Don’t share deep listening research. It’s associated with John Gottman Theory.
“I hear you” book survey 2021:
I do a complete survey on Goodreads for the “I hear you” book review. Below, I mention people choices in 3catagories for Appropriate reasons.
| Review categories | A number of people: | Reasons: |
| Yes: | 250 | Short and sweet. Motivation for conversation. Simple technique. Valid through emotions with empathy. Real-life verbal examples. It connects with everyone. Summarize each chapter. Clarify empathy from Validation. It enhances listening ability. It Encourages Effective vocabulary. Validate then advising. Your Effective response matters than good intentions. Validating other emotions doesn’t mean they’re right. Practical method. Applicable in everyday life. |
| No: | 12 | Limited scope. Too many highlights. Never value personal feelings towards validation. It’s Less personal, more social. Non-professional wrote. You leave opinion effect. Validation is an old concept. Beginner level relationship book. Same Theories as John Gottman. |
| Neutral: | 34 | Grammatical errors through descriptive language. It can be an article. Less complexity. Everyone is not children. Basic advice. It provides Personal experience, not scientific research. |
“I hear you” book Benefits:
I give the advantages and tips about it. It makes “I hear you” a book for quality review.
Improves relationship:
The book improves your every relationship. It provides techniques for this.
We design for social connections. Everyone’s want validation. The relationship gets blocked without Validation. Read about Jordan Peterson communication guide.
Empower self-compassion:
Everyone has self-compassion. We don’t know about its usage. The book shares technique. It gives your compassion valuable for relationships.
Provides Calm:
Our poor listening ability hurts others. It hurts us back. The techniques of the book resolve your uncertainties towards others. Your losing fear and irrelevant relationship concerns eliminate.
Regulates love:
Listening to others properly automatically enhances the love feeling. It enhances respect and appreciation.
Your arguments can resolve better. You save from irrelevant discussions.
Supportive without solution:
You assist others in sharing their viewpoints.
You give relevant and valuable advice. That gives others complete encouragement sense without a solution.
Open-ended speech:
The author suggests speaking with open-ended words. Never close others’ points of view. Use “and” instead of But. Avoid “Often or Most” words.
Validation is unexpected:
The author teaches practical ways to validate others. It’s not necessary to agree with others for validation. Validation is Emotional based.
There is no specific time for validation. You can validate in a celebratory situation.
Creative towards Validation:
Sorensen enforces validation points throughout the book.
His experiences align with it. Revalidation gives a sense towards expression.
We enclose the discussion in an open-ended way. It adds charisma to your communication skill.
Empathy over sympathy:
We show sympathy towards people to make them feel good. Sorensen method promotes empathy. It gives crucial tips about it.
Sympathy gives a sense of burden on others. Empathy gives a sense of support from others.
Emotional expression:
It gives them the courage to identify your emotional response. Besides, you allow yourself to express your emotions. You allow positive or negative emotions as well.
Your emotional expression allows others to express more.
Listening over offering:
Sometimes, an offering isn’t the solution. Listening allows exploring others. You can explore various factors. Once you listen appropriate, you align offering that way.
Beginner level relationship book:
If you never read a book about validation, it’s best for you. The basic listening guide is practical and observable.
It’s general advice enough ability to boost listening. Your views expand with it. Sorensen doesn’t explain specific situation responses. It’s great for a basic mindset shift.
“I hear you” book Criticism:
I mention the general criticism of the “I hear you” book review.
Gender difference communication:
The book never highlights the role of genders in communication. Each gender communicates specifically. The author never values communication style for each gender.
Suppress personal feelings:
Not everyone can’t go through others’ emotional experiences. It makes the conversation better.
It doesn’t change the situation for others. That can hurt your personal views.
Arise Flattery:
You may make conversation likeable. The other may feel better with you. In the long term, Others don’t like your judgment because it’s not genuine.
Not explanatory:
The book gives validation advice in a general way. Sorensen never mentions winning trust or developing trust ways.
Other self-help authors have deep study about it. Besides, a specific relationship quality varies. It doesn’t highlight or resolve a specific issue in a relationship. For example; Personal obsession, biases, jealousy and relationship fear.
Support unnecessary Validation:
It doesn’t promote the suggestion of a solution for others. You can’t add value through desirable conversation. Sometimes, a harsh reaction is essential for condemning criminal deeds. You can’t correct others through the author’s method.
Support other’s best version:
Validating others’ destructive emotions doesn’t make you a genuine friend. You give people Wrong hope. Your instant response may hurt them.
It’s your responsibility to support others’ best version. Never pretend sympathy towards bad version acceptance.
Small scope book:
The book is short. It’s easy to read but unprofessionally written. Sorensen doesn’t explain other aspects of communication.
The book has grammatical errors. It has a less professional reading grip. Easy to read in a single setting. It offers less to reflect.
Never align with Personality type:
Everyone has a specific personality type. Some people don’t show empathy with a simple technique.
Sorensen Should specify techniques for specific personality types.
Personal experience based:
Sorensen never researches to write this book. It’s a quick short rea with basic advice.
Sorensen shares personal experiences to grip the readers.
His experience is valuable. Complete research gives shortfalls of his techniques.
Based on John Gottman Theory:
Sorensen takes several aspects from John Gottman theory to explain his method. Validation and empathy are essential for an everlasting relationship. Besides, Other factors are associated with listening. It’s like forgiveness, anger, judgment or hope.
Devalue self-reliance:
We don’t require a favour from others all time. Sometimes, it’s crucial to stand alone. We don’t require to die along with someone. If other has lethal intention, condemning is essential.
No doubt, empathy plays a crucial role in understanding others. We require self courage to show ourselves.
Resources to buy “I hear you” book:
- Audible(Audiobook).
- Barnesandnoble.
- Target(Paper book).
- Amazon(E-book).
